The Church of hollar

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About The Church of Hollar

WE ARE SO GLAD YOU FOUND US!

 

The Modern Holy Church of Hollar was founded in 2019 after a completely legit and 100% historical document, The Book of Hollar, was discovered in a pyramid in Egypt by S-Class archeologists. The totally real fact that it was found in a pyramid further serves as evidence to its authenticity since every important ancient artifact ever found was indeed found inside of an Egyptian pyramid, as everyone knows.

The chamber it was being held in was heavily trapped with poison dart traps and giant rolling boulder. Countless Archeological Adventurers tragically lost their lives in trying to retrieve this artifact.

What? Yes, of course there are Archeological Adventurers. The S-Class people employ them to get artifacts from trapped chambers, duh?? Haven't you seen Indiana Jones?? Anyway...

After the religion's founder, "The Father", read the book after pirating it online, he had the Forelands First Church of Hollar built on the historical site where it is said the ancient Church of Forelandia was built. It was then that the first new Pillar of Extreme Holiness in millennia was built, thus restoring the Great Pillar Network of Holiness. Now, The Father remains hidden away from human eyes because he is the one and only prophet capable of speaking with the Pillar. Therefore, anyone who sees him would instantly die. This is the only reason, and it is NOT because he does not want the police to know his true name and location, as is commonly rumored. Not that he would need to fear the police anyway. He has the power of God and anime on his side.

The religion gained a worldwide following after the very first live-streamed and televised gift of wealth to the new Pillar of Extreme Holiness disappeared upon hitting the stone in front of the pillar. The Father had his loyal priests check the premises off-camera for any kind of trick or mechanism, but they found nothing. This is when The Father is famously quoted as saying, "We investigated ourselves, and found that we did nothing wrong."

Since then, all gifts to The Pillar have been dealt with in kind, being whisked away to The Holy Realm, where The Pillar of Extreme Holiness gives all of the gifts to, like, the poor or whatever.

 

Check online listings for local churches in your area. Or, if there is no church near you, consider taking our "Priest of Hollar" crash course and planting your own! Certification only takes 15 minutes and comes with a FREE "Build-Your-Own Pillar" Kit, so you too can create your own religious idol on a budget! A Suggested Mandatory Donation (SMD) of $500 USD applies. Enquire today!